Uncertainty

Over the last couple of days two things have happened that have left me feeling sad and for some reason, slightly insecure.

On Wednesday a very dear friend phoned to say that his mother had died that morning, just woken up, told her husband she felt ill and died before the ambulance arrived. She was a lovely lady, we’d met her a few times, even, some years ago, had a holiday in her flat on the south coast, and now she’s gone.

Last night, another friend telephoned to tell me she has been diagnosed with macular degenerative disease of the eye; which probably means she will eventually lose her sight. She’s elderly and lives alone and her main comforts apart from music are reading, writing loads of letters and watching TV. How on earth will she cope?

Earlier this year another friend rang to say she had been diagnosed with the early stages of breast cancer, she has now undergone treatment and all is well, as somehow deep down inside, I knew they would be, but the worry for her was always there.

I think these things, which wonderfully brave people have to cope with every day make you feel your own fragility and make you slightly uneasy for your own future. As you get older you start to worry about these things. Today I feel really old.